The key to change is to let go of fear. ~Roseanne Cash
I think the journey to a healthier life is a journey about letting go of my fears. I often make poor food choices because there is something that I fear I will lose if I eat in a more healthy manner. Maybe I fear I will lose pleasure, maybe I fear I will lose the distraction that food often is from my anxieties about life.
Yesterday, as I walked to my car after work, I noticed that I also fear or am averse to physiological arousal that exercise creates. If I get winded, I am afraid of others judging me for being an out-of-shape person. Well, guess what? They are going to think that anyway because the vast majority have eyes! So, I decided, instead of buying into this fear or anxiety that my mind created, I would walk faster and visualize my heart growing stronger and stronger the more I pushed myself to experience physiological symptoms, which is more in line with what I know about physiology of the body. And, for my brief walk, I felt comforted by this image. Also, in that moment, I cared more about the strength of my heart than I did about strangers' impressions, and I felt empowered.
I find the predictions that our minds make very interesting. And, when I reflect on the ones that my mind makes (and then even write it down here), I feel that I could bust out in belly laughs. My mind is a big, fat con artist that tells me the most ludicrous stories! The funniest part is how much I believe them without even challenging them.
Today, I am practicing awareness of the stories that my mind tells me, and I am examining these stories with curiosity to see what I think about them when I pay attention without acting immediately on them.
If you read this, I challenge you to pay attention to what your mind tells you and if that gets in the way of any form of health for you. Brave ones -- post about it!
Peace,
Shelly
Oh, and I have lost nearly 4 lbs. since Friday just by using weight watchers to keep track of my food! What a bonus!
ReplyDeleteDearest Shelly,
ReplyDeleteI am moved by what you are writing here in this blog. I have shared and am sharing these same feelings regarding choices about health. I am in a constant tug of war that being aware forces me to be focused on what is wrong with my health habbits or what could become wrong. Because of the cancer history in my family I stand in an underlying dread that any day now my body will turn and attack me and prevent me from living the life I want so it is easier for me to ignore it and fool myself that I am happy when I feed it like a spoiled child who will throw a tantrum if I don't. I have started putting my weight back on too and everyday I fight and fuss and argue with myself if I will choose to be responsible about logging back into weight watchers, start exercising again, practice my prayer and meditation, eat organic foods, get on the scale, monitor my budgeting and spending habits or NOT! I have not found a solution that quiets this constant battle yet and I am tired. The more I have alot of success and fall off the path I find it harder and harder to get back on because of the supossed futility of it all. Perhaps this is the pack of lies my mind is telling me. I just haven't mastered how to be aware and not think myself to death at the same time. Ah the journey begins....... Tracy :)